i really wanna find someone to talk to
i feel troubled
i feel lonely
it feels like i have lost everyone
imma screw up
work was really stress
im being pushed around everyday
but i cant vent out my frustrations
and theres no one around mi
im tired
my health is failing
im falling apart
i just need to release
release all the stress
i don rmb when was the last time
i really smiled from my heart

why is everyone so far away from mi
why ah why ah?
till now i have been helping others with their problems
but then i realised im the one that needs help
im not saying that im weak
but everyone needs to have people, friends beside
them once in a while right?
no matter how strong u are
no one is perfect
all i wanted was someone to really listen to me
to hear my feelings and cheer mi up
thats all i want
why isnt there anyone that bothered about my absence?
why why?
am i just so insignificant?



im all worn out..............................

You Are Not Alone

Written and Composed by R. Kelly

Another day has gone
I'm still all alone
How could this be
You're not here with me
You never said goodbye
Someone tell me why
Did you have to go
And leave my world so cold
Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did love slip away
Something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay

But you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
But you are not alone

All alone,
'Why, oh

Just the other night
I thought I heard you cry
Asking me to come
And hold you in my arms
I can hear your prayers
Your burdens I will bear
But first I need your hand
Then forever can begin

Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did love slip away

Something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay

For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
For you are not alone

Whisper three words and I'll come runnin'
And girl you know that I'll be there
I'll be there

You are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay
For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart

For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay

For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart

For you are not alone...

i saw what i din wanna see
i felt something burning inside me,
if god wants me to be a part of this game,
den i will admit defeat
cause all i feel is pain.





why ah why ah?
why everything have to turn out this way?
how many more scars do i have to take?


for once in my life i would like to live in honesty,
rather than in misery...

what a boring day!
its just sleep and sleep
everything is alone
my life is becoming black and white
dullness~

finally feeling better already
body was feeling so stiff and
weak cuz of sleeping too much i guess
so decided to go for a walk and
breathe some fresh air.
while strolling around the park
beside my house, i spotted a
basketball court :)
so i joined in a game or two
that felt really good
its been a long time
since i played
and i have to say
the time difference really matters
LOL
i tire easily now
play one game need to
sit down and refill oil already
guess im old
or i just recover lah.

after that i sat down
on a bench to recharge
and did some thinking

wondering how my friends
were doing,
BLAH BLAH BLAH~
many other stuff
dont wanna name it out
maybe being alone wasnt
a bad thing after all?
well i still have a long way to find out

i suddenly realised i haven
spoke for a long time OO
i haven talked since last thursday
HAHA
ok that sounds stupid


there is someone i really miss though
that special girl thats kept in my heart.....
although, thats the only place i can keep her.....

im sick
i feel down
loneliness
but i guess
it will make
me stronger
this way.
i wont whine
or complain
i will accept
is being alone
a good thing?
well i will find out.


as each day goes by,
i just love u more and more
but i know someday
u will eventually leave
i respect, admired and love u
always have,
always will.
i know u have many good friends now
i feel happy for u.
thks again for the wonderful memories
appreciated loves
take care and good luck. :))))))))

SHIT!
im down fever again
was tossing and turning
this morning and afternoon
so woke up to have something to eat
i thought i was just hungry
and thought that im just
having muscle aches
went back to sleep
and suddenly felt
my chest was burning
and my head was heavy

im in great pain right now
how am i gonna explain myself
for not going to work?
i dont have a hp and i cant walk
this is terrible
i really i dont wanna get fired :(

PLS FUCK OFF FEVER!!
I HAD ENOUGH OF U LAST WEEK!!

went to bugis ytd with
vanessa to alter my jeans
while waiting for our jeans
we walked around at bugis st
and went to teenage cafe to
have my dinner
steph jie joined us after that

around 8+ we went back
to collect our jeans
and i really think my
legs are thin like hell
especially wearing skinny
well only my legs are thin
throughout my whole body
so not proportionate - -
but im still happy with the jeans lah
finally got it altered :)

edison jio us go movie
and we were running late
so vanessa had to book a cab
and she was really lucky
the cab no. given was 8888
LOL
who would be so lucky?



thats the merz cab we booked: 8888!! HUAT AH!





and thats not all
guess how much
was our cab fare?
$8.80!!!
wth!
all 8s
we should really go buy 4D
confirm dio tao bio uh!
LOL~


ok i know we were like knuckleheads
BUT WHO CAN GET THIS LUCKY
haha

anyways we were late for our movie
and we are still so happy
haha
the movie was called BEOWOLF
not bad i would say
its in CG(computer graphics)
and its done perfectly
better than the ones
i saw in final fantasy
and i love watching CG animation
enjoyed it :)




everything seems well right
well at the end of the day,
i found out that i lost my phone!
i guess it slipped out of my pocket
while im watching movie.
when i went back to the cinema with
steph to find my phone it wasnt there
and my phone was off.......
ok i know im careless and dumb
im already suay and pissed enough
whats worse
took a bus to go home
and i fell asleep all the way
to jurong interchange
and there wasnt any bus back
have to cab back home
GREAT
at this time when im broke
zZzZz
NOW IM BROKE AND PHONE-LESS
was i so tired till so careless?
sigh~



stupidity cant be cured
and im one stupid ass
thats why i dont deserve anything
idiotic morons dont deserve to be loved

today at work was SLACKINGGGGGGGGGG :x
as expected on Wednesdays
no crowd
no orders
BUT......
to cover all that slackness up
we had to move all the furnitures
in the live room up and down
those furnitures are god damn heavy!!
and i got aches and scratches
all over my hands and body now
shouldnt have done too many push-ups
the day before i went work. - -


anyways
ended early today
and went zouk to find
tin with edison
after that headed MOS for awhile
SO LONG NEVER GO MOS!
LOL
it used to be called
our '2nd home'
TRANCE AHHH
SHUFFLEEEEEE
finally got to shuffle
and to sweat out a bit
left around 4.30 with edison and tin
thx boss for the ride home :)


now im dead tired
good nights everyone *.*

An jing by Jay Chou

Zhi sheng xia gang qin pei wo tan le yi tian
Shui jiao de da ti qin
An Jing de jiu jiu de
Wo xiang ni yi biao xian de fei chang ming bai
Wo dong wo ye zhi dao
Ni mei you she bu de
Ni shuo ni ye hui nan guo wo bu xiang xin
Qian zhe ni pei zhe wo ye zhi shi cheng jin
Xi wang ta shi zhen de bi wo hai yao ai ni
Wo cai hui bi zi ji li kai

Ni yao wo shuo duo nan kan
Wo gen ben bu xiang fen kai
Wei she me hai yao wo yong wei xiao lai dai guo
Wo mei you zhe zhong tian fen
bao rong ni ye jie shou ta
Bu yao dan xin de tai duo
Wo hui yi zhi hao hao guo

Ni yi jin yuan yuan li kai
Wo ye hui man man zou kai
Wei she me wo lian fen kai dou qian jiu zhe ni
Wo zhen de mei you tian fen
An jing de mei zhe me kuai
Wo hui xue zhe fang qi ni
Shi ying wei wo tai ai ni

what more can i say?
what more can i do?
ur just walking further and further away
and yet im right here,
waiting for u to turn back
after reading ur blog,
my heart simply broke
though i dunno what really happened,
it was too hard to look
i followed my instincts all the way here
everything ended up back to square 1.
ur just no longer here anymore
i cant even find ur shadow
as selfish as i am,
i still wanna wish u well
wish u luck
hope that he will appreciates u like i do
looking at u turning ur back
and walking away from my sight,
i feel a sharp pain
and its a wound that can never be healed.....



my tears trickled down as i was looking at ur blog
and as i was typing this down.......
take care my love.........

send me a pic of ur front view next time
dont let pple see ur thick lips :X



this handsome here wants mi
to post his face again
but hes afraid pple might think
that we are gays.
LOL.
it doesnt matter
true friends are
meant to be cherished
dont be shy lah brother~~ :)

everytime when i see
her blog its depressing.
as each day pass by,
i just feel so insignificant
like im no longer even part
of her world.
that name just keeps appearing
yes im jealous
who wouldnt be?
yes i feel like crap
and who knows?
no one in this world.
but can i do anything
about it other then just watch?

i may not be able to be the man
that she wants mi to be.
i may not be able to treat her
the same way like that guy
but at least i know deep down
in my heart,
i know firmly that i wont stop
loving her.
i would rather hear her scolding
and throwing her temper at mi
than just ignoring my feelings. :(

being thrown around like
a fucking boomerang at work
is already bad enough.
moreover im sick
no choice
i chose to accept this job
so i will have bear it
even if thy pour a pile of
shit over my head.
im not exaggerating
thats just how my
seniors treat me.
i work ma ass off
and THIS?!
i know im new and everything
but as a fellow colleague,
i dont think i deserve
this kind of treatment!


FUCKING HELL!
IM DONE HERE!

DAMN IT IM SICK! :(
just give me the strength
to last for these 2 days.
after that cant walk i also dont mind uh
but can recover on wed can already.
pls pls.
AND BLOODY HELL DONT KEEP
ASKING ME WHY I NEVER PICK
UP MY PHONE YTD
I DONT REPEAT MYSELF SO MANY
TIMES. I CANT USE MY PHONE WHILE
IM WORKING!!!!! THANKS :)

end of 2nd day working at plush
what do i think?
hmmmm.
just so-so
but i would just say 1 thing
the seniors there are just
attitude problematics
other then that i still think its fine :)

the first day was damn tiring
busy and messed up
firstly,
it was public holiday eve,
so the crowd was better then usual
secondly,
out of the 5 floor staff we have,
its the first day of work for the 4 of us.
so the results?
1. orders taken randomly and it was confusing.
2. order slips that we gave to the bartender were not attended to
so most of the orders had to be voided.
3. everyone was busy running up and down the club
not knowing what to do.
4. lastly, EVERYONE OF US DIO GAN!

amongst the 4 new guys including me,
3 of them already decided not to work anymore
well as for today,
its just left with me and CJ(my colleague)
it was underage party so its not so tiring.
but at the end of the day
CJ told me he also will be quitting
he said he cant take it
mainly is cuz he has never been through night life.
and he cant take it mentally
by right today should be his last day
but after closing everyone was trying
to psycho him to try out once more.
so he LLST(LAN LAN SUCK THUMB) have to work
but its gonna be his last day tmr.
LOL.
he's a cute fellow
total guai kia lah.
dont club, dont drink and no night life for him.
u really miss out many things in life dude
but i understand so i was always there to help him
apparently he told mi that jobs whereby u have to face
the customer directly just dont suit him.
ALAMAK!
still got this kind of dai ji ah?!
LOL
but anyways i wish u good luck
finding another job outside
it was nice knowing u :)
and dont get stressed up so easily.
CHILL~

so basically after tml night
i'll be working alone
and once again we will be short-handed
sigh~~~



dont worry i wont quit
im starting to like this job actually :)
thanks to those who supported me.






seeing u at work just brightens up my day.
all my fatigue just disappears the moment i lay my eyes on u. :)

FCUKING PISSED WITH MY MSN!
just my luck
received a virus ytd
and my msn has been
out of control ever since.
F**KING HELL!
spent the whole day at home
trying to clear the virus
tried whatever ways i could
reinstalled msn;
use the virus scanner
tried d/loading the avg but system could not be d/loaded
norton couldnt do shit either.
TSK~
sorry that i keep sending weird stuff.
that thing is auto
i cant control it either.
so pls dont accept anything i send















i really hope u still would care like u used to...
sigh... am i so insignificant to u?

i dreamed about u last night
or rather had flashbacks....
images of what we did in the past
how happy i was spending every sec with u
how annoying and ignorant i was
we had our ups and downs
but i enjoyed every moment spent with u
how i wish i never woke up from those dreams...








does she know that i still care?
that i still love her?
or am i just a past tense
just another chapter in her book?

HAHA
im posting for my dearest brother
from another mother: DANIEL LIEW
u wanted mi to post our old pics
and here it goes.

WA LAU SHI CHOU DE LOH X:




ok lah. these 2 pics not that old

it represents BROTHERHOOD!! (:








ok the following photos
are just plain ugly.
LOL
go back to those days
where we were rebellious
OMG SHI CHOU DE~!






only 1 word to describe: UGLY!!


we just kept smoking like nobody business x:



ok i dunno why thy wanna take this pic
we dont look emo at all.
more like drug addicts....... x:

YES MAN!!
got a call from edison
and i will be starting work
this wed at plush
the pay is not bad
and i will do my best

THKS BOSS!! (:

haha
i was too bored so
went to dig out some
old pictures of daniel
LOL
sorry ah bro
let people see nvm lah hor
:p
ni shi shuai de loh.




LOLS~ fit de wor

tired after majiong~ PONG! CHI! GANG! HU AH!


too bored at work~~ sorry thats my old
hair. i know it looks beng but im not. thks


HAHA CAUGHT ALVIN SLEEPING!!
EH WAKE UP LAH
NEXT STOP REACH LIAO STILL SLEEP! :P




haha
those were the good old times
fun and laughter peace and joy~
(;

sorry dad

initially i was going town to meet up vanessa
but while on my way i realised that my dad was hospitalized
so i told van i couldnt meet her.
sorry bout that.

apparently my dad was hospitalized
cuz he fell down during work and
hurt his head and knee.
doctor said there wasnt any serious injuries
and he should be able to discharge tml.

but, while looking at my dad lying
on the hospital bed,
i felt worried and concern about him.
to say the truth,
i used to hate my dad
abandoning my mum and myself.
to me, the moment he left the house
i told myself that my dad was dead.
tsk
after my mum passed away
things between us got even worse
we quarreled the moment we start a conversation
we dont understand each other
as father and son.
to put it simply
whenever we start quarreling,
it would be like hercules VS hades
and thunderstorm everywhere.

but im trying to change all that
things seems to get better
between us.
we dont quarrel anymore
and im happy about it.
we should respect each other
cuz the both of us are
trying to struggle for survival,
to live by each day without
any troubles happening.

in fact now i respect my dad
more and more each day
he is strong man.
even when we are facing hardships,
he is still living happily
and never complaining.
and thanks dad for the valuable lesson. (:


DAD I APOLOGIZED FOR NOT BEING A GOOD SON
AND I HOPE U WILL RECOVER SOON
U STILL OWE MI MONEY HOR!!!
HAHA.



"in life not everything can go the way u wanted
especially love,
love is something that needs time to nourish
and when the time is right,
naturally u and her will be together.
whats important is not the end results
but the process thats makes a person feel so sweet"

THANKS DAD FOR THE ADVICE (:

another friday at plush
but unlike other days,
today i din enjoy myself
guess many of my friends know why
and sorry to everyone that i caused
so much unhappiness
thanks for being there for me. (:

havent ate anything for 2 days
and my gastric is killing me.
food just dont appear on my mind right now.

i've been a total jerk lately.
my attitude just got the better of me
and in the process i may lose someone
important to me.
that was not how i wanted things to end,
but when shit happens there really isnt
anything i can do about it.
i just wanna apologise for my rudeness
guess good things dont last forever.
sadness, heart-broken, jealousy and anger
all at the same time.
this teach a lesson to us all
'when u found someone that is important to u,
cherish them with everything u have.
cause when u lose them,
the pain is really unbearable.'


i just wanna let u know
that whoever arms ur in
i will be standing right here
on the same spot,
waiting for u.....

love is selfish,
love is blind,
but when u do love someone,
everything u do,
that person will just keep appearing in ur mind.

i put our picture as my wallpaper
cuz whenever i wake up and turn on my com,
seeing our picture just puts a smile on my face.

went changi airport last night
with leon and van
bumped into dino there
hmmm
quite a memorable place
anyways we chilled at mac
and at around 4+
some of us were getting sleepy
only leon was wide awake
he aizai can
morning took bus to van's place
and cab home from there
DAMN EX LAHHHHH!






the 2 of u are getting too sweet for comfort
and the thought of losing you seems unbearable..............
u just dont understand what situation im in..
my heart is feeling heavy and light at the same time....
im sorry for the harsh attitude
regrettably i cant forgive myself either........